afternoon indulgence

The hubs gave me an afternoon spa vacation… not sure if it was for mother's day or perhaps for our anniversary… and the gift card sat in my little file of papers on my crowded desk. At the risk of forgetting it or just not taking advantage of it, I made my appointment a few weeks ago. I decided to take the plunge. The only appointments they had were in the middle of the week. Do I dare take an afternoon off to pamper myself?
Not only yes, but hell yes!
It's been an incredibly tumultuous past nine months. Corporate merger, increased work load, new bosses, new accountability procedures, more pressure, family friction… it's not been an easy go. An afternoon spa vacation sounded like a small corner of heaven.
And it was.
Upon arriving, I was ushered into a calmly lit dressing room where I divested myself of the sports skirt and sleeveless tee and locked away my belongings, including my lifeline to the outside world… my cell phone. I turned that sucker off and went off to indulge myself in an afternoon removed from all earthly trappings.
Freedom!
After an hour-long massage that kneaded out the tension in my neck and shoulders {not completely, but I'll take what I can get!}, I was ushered into a small alcove where lunch awaited me. Really? Lunch?? Chicken salad croissant {I only splurged on 1/4 of the bread} accompanied by a luxurious fruit cup. I haven't had fruit in 9 weeks…can I just say I had escaped to heaven? It was divine. I ate the fruit off the chocolate drizzled cheesecake, too, and I'm not gonna lie… I had two bites of cheesecake. It was a tiny cheat, but I figured, since I'm in heaven, it won't matter, right?
It's not like a cup of fruit and two bites of cheesecake is going to turn me in to a Macy's Day Balloon!
After lunch, I enjoyed a steamy shower, slipped back into my own clothing and dried and fixed my hair. Off to a spa mani and pedi.
Ooooo La La!! I'm hooked.
Soaking and salt scrub. Hot paraffin wax treatment. Lotion massage. Cuticle cream, buffing, polish.  
It's such a little thing, but I have found having my nails painted makes me feel so put together! Who knew?

I'm no hand model, that's for sure! But it makes my hands so happy!

And having a nice pedi the day before I went to the foot doctor to have a suspicious lump looked at… that was providential timing!

Throughout the afternoon, though, I hand pangs of shame. I don't deserve this kind of pampering. I shouldn't be taking this much time off of work. I haven't done anything to merit this much favor.
I know many would say, Of course you do! You work hard! It's been a tough year!
And to a degree, that's true.
But I also know there are so many more deserving of this treatment. People who have suffered or sacrificed so much more than me.
I'm so thankful that my husband loves me enough to pamper me in such an extravagant fashion. It's not an everyday occasion. I thoroughly enjoyed my afternoon. It was luxurious and relaxing and made me feel beautiful. Even though as soon as I left, I returned home to catch up on work.
But as my fingers flew across my computer keyboard, I admired the pretty french manicure.
And began dreaming of going again someday.

I'm happy to report the suspicious lump on my foot is a ganglion cyst, and not something more serious. And the foot pain I've been experiencing is nothing more than plantar fasciitis. If I had been paying attention to the symptoms, I would have been able to self-diagnose that one. Duh. My son had it for a few years, and our symptoms are identical!

PINT: the uninspired version

it's PINT. i'm too lazy to tell you how to link up.

Can you hear me now?

There's not alot on my mind these days… but that's never stopped me from speaking what little there is! ha!
I've had some awesome conversations over the past week with REAL people. I know… amazing, right? And I've had some great contributions (OL and IRL) to my question about living radically for Jesus. I've been consciously and intentionally engaging in human interaction of the real-life variety and have been blessed for my efforts.
On Monday, I met three of my old college sorority sisters. This was a source of some pre-meeting anxiety for me… not knowing who was going to be there or how many… having gained weight since college… having only been a member for a year (I deactivated after having to appear before the counsel for having dropped out of school for two quarters… paying for school and sorority myself was overwhelming and their lack of understanding my absence was the catalyst for me deactivating) I was fearful of not being accepted. It's funny how easy it is to go right back to all those high school/college insecurities. It ended up being really fun, and there was a small crowd, which helped alleviate my concerns. I didn't talk too much (a miracle in itself) and felt like I really belonged. We're planning on doing this on a regular basis. Next time, I'll bring my camera!
Lately, it seems the hardest conversations I have are the ones with the Hubs. I don't know if it's just too much togetherness or that we are impatient to really listen to one another's hearts. I'm sure there's a bit of both involved. I'm striving to be a better listener (yes, another miracle, folks!) and affirm his ideas and resist the urge to criticize. It's the ones we are closest to that are often the hardest relationships!
I had a great week of interacting and investing and breathing Life into my friends and those I'm in ministry with.
I've discovered that living radically for Jesus is an ongoing process… for me this week it means getting out of my comfort zone, interacting with people and listening. For anyone that knows me… that last one is pretty radical!

Rhythm of Life

Not only did I have to set my own alarm clock for this morning, but I had to make my own coffee, empty out the brew basket myself, feed the dogs and walk all the way to the street and get the paper. I had to pour my own milk. Put out my own vitamins. Do my own devotion.
I know, poor baby, right?
Well, if the Hubs was home, all of this would have been finished for me. Or at least done together.
It's the rhythm of life. At least for us, it is.
The Hubs is in Atlanta, at our corporate office. He's there looking at truck options (mobile Petro's) and pre-fab building manufacturers (for plopping down a ready-made Petro's). He's also catering a golf tournament for one of our partners in the hopes that a potential franchisee might pop out of the woodwork. It's what we fondly refer to as shaking hands and kissing babies.
Speaking of shaking hands and kissing babies…
I went to a gubernatorial {who makes up words like these anyways!!?} debate at the UT Alumni Hall (newly repurposed… it's a beautiful auditorium in one of the older buildings on campus. It used to be the old basketball arena…a really long time ago.). My favorite candidate is a personal friend of ours… it's crazy to think that he will more than likely end up living in the gubernatorial mansion in Nashville soon. CRAZY. He is the former mayor of Knoxville and is just the realest, most preciously honest Christian man I know. {I know, honest politician is sort of an oxymoron, but he is. He's the real deal.) He loves Jesus and loves people and would like to help everyone… but realizes that all these things requires revenue and he's a responsible budgeter. I don't envy that job. not at all.
Sorry… I wandered down a dead-end street there… I'm back.
I love our little routines. Even when I complain about them. Sometimes I don't always want to be the laundry girl… but when he steps into that role… it usually results in me having to do extra ironing, so it's best that I just do it myself. I don't take out the trash… he doesn't dust the house. He is the resident critter-gitter… I wash windows.
We have this little pattern. This rhythm together.
I'm not a huge fan of banging this drum by myself, but it's okay. It's not for long.
I think of my in-laws who are joined at the hip. It's hard not to think about how it will look when they're not a pair anymore. I'm aware of my friends who are playing solo…and not by choice. The music they're making is not the same as it was…
That's not to say that the sound isn't beautiful.
The important thing is that the music continues…

radical

Still pondering and praying about what it looks like to live radically for Christ. I'm not a fan of locusts. Thankfully, I don't think the God of the Bible is asking me to change my diet that way.
But I do think He's calling me to change. Change my diet for what I desire…for what He desires.
Have you heard about Radical, by David Platt?
{watch it on youtube for the full effect. this format doesn't allow enough room to see it well}

I haven't read it yet… but I'm getting ready to.
I'm praying about what living radically looks like.
Have you read this book? What are your thoughts?

PINT: pining for a lost friend edition

thanks to that one mom for hosting my weekly meme. Check out what others have gone on and on about… all on a post-it, of course!

all things new

BABETTE COLLAVO, NPS PHOTO

What is it about the changing of a season that gets me so excited!? {Except for winter. That is so not exciting, and if it wasn't for Christmas, I would boycot the season entirely.}

Fall here in East Tennessee is beautiful. Even though it's early October, the leaves really haven't even begun to turn… we're still a few weeks away. There's nothing quite like the fall display of colors in the Smokey Mountains. One look across a valley of autumnal splendor and you can almost smell the hot apple cider and fresh-baked pumpkin bread. 

I love me some fall!
I also think there's nothing quite like a beautifully sunny, crisply cool Monday. Mondays can be hard for some, but really, I have this totally renewed feeling like I could really accomplish something amazing. Is it because I had a delightfully relaxing weekend? {And by "delightfully relaxing," I mean taking the car in for an oil change, taking the dogs for rabies shots, getting a box springs from the warehouse, stopping at the grocers, sewing curtains and cleaning out the pantry/closet downstairs… which of course did not include traveling all weekend to work and sweat at a college football game.} It's easy to feel refreshed and ready to start a new week.
To appease the hubs, I've also embarked on a quest to cultivate IRL friendships. As someone who works from home and rarely has to leave the house {except to forage for food}, it's key to my well-being and sanity to seek out human interaction.
I've done this nicely in blog-land. I've developed some sweet friendships with people I never would have encountered IRL, and I'm super thankful for the interesting, inspiring, incredible women I've met in cyberland. I love that I can hang out with my friends at a moment's notice. I don't have to make a "playdate" with any of them. I can choose to visit at my whims… even if it is at 2 in the morning. Some of my friends are just a tweet away. And even though some of these conversations happen with people watching in the fringes, it's a fun way to share bits and pieces of life.
IRL relationships are not so easy. And for me… it brings back feelings of self-doubt and social anxiety. I am going to a gathering of sorority sisters tonight. Since I deactivated my sophomore year, I don't really feel like I belong… but I'm going at the coaxing of a friend who happens to be the mother of one of BamaGirl's closest friends. So I'm going… but I'm nervous about it.
Tuesday is the Young Life banquet. Over 2,000 people will be there… and my nephew will be one of the speakers. With the exception of my SIL, the entire family will be at our table {an answer to prayer} and while I don't think any of them will be quite ready to walk the aisle, it's another opportunity to be sowing seeds for our unbelieving family. BoyWonder is attending his first banquet as an attendee…so exciting to see a new generation investing in the lives of high schoolers.
Wednesday is youth group activities and the afternoon and evening will fly by… late dinner with the Hubs afterwards. Sometimes we grab a few leaders and make a party of it.
Thursday I'm having lunch with three friends who are moms of BamaGirl's friends. People I don't normally see, yet enjoy. I'm finding I have to be super intentional about spending time together. It's so easy to say Oh, we really should get together… and then never do.  Later that day, I'm attending a rally followed by a political debate. Our former mayor, and personal friend, is running for Governor and I'm going to lend my support. The Hubs will be in Atlanta, so I'll be going stag. Another potentially awkward/uncomfortable social scenario. Pray for me not to have diarrhea of the mouth I usually get when I'm nervous.
Friday will be here before I know it. I'm still debating on having the yard sale early since the weekend I scheduled it for is actually the weekend I'll be away at fall camp with our high schoolers from church. Whoops! The following weekend would be alright, but with BamaGirl and BamaGirl's BamaBoy coming in for the big game, that might be more to bite off than I'm ready for.
Whew. I think I need a nap.