happy, happy, joy, joy (thank goodness)

the last post was anything but happy. sorry about that. life gets kinda gritty sometimes. (and snotty, but i won't go there)

and i had to have my time to waller.

but it's over now.

there's alot of silence from alabama. and as much as i would like to think that she's gone and forgotten her momma, you know, the one who gave birth to, the one who held the hair away from her face as she hurled into the commode, the one who was her go-to person. always.

but here's a news flash, you old empty-nester. . . it's not about you!

(that continues to be a news flash every time i hear that)

what the silence means is that bamagirl is having the time of her life.

setting up her new place (and what's not to love about a living room with a 42" plasma tv??), making new friends, sweating in the alabama heat and humidity, rushing, grabbing meals with friends, and staying up late skyping with her high school friends. i'm afraid parents are way down the list of things to do.

ouch.

i think the thing that hurts this mother's rather fragile, tender heart is being so easily dismissed.

i'm pretty sure i did that to my mom, too. i'd ask her about it, but she's been gone ten years now. and that makes this mother's tender, fragile little heart hurt just a little bit more.

so the silence, while deafening at times, is a far cry from endless phone calls about how much she hates it and wants to come home. that would make this mother's tender heart ache with the desire to make it better.

growing up is hard to do. trust me, i know. i'm still growing up.