if it's monday, i know i didn't do it!

monday's the day when i'm "bruttaly honest and living to tell about it," along with the zillions of people addicted to the activity begun by mckmamma. check it out, there's alot of denying going on out there, and it's usally pretty hilarious!

this past week was a flurry of activity. boy wonder was home from college on spring break, but we were not the least bit bitter that the weather was LAME and that most of his break was spent recouperating from oral surgery. i didn't watch/enable him to spend the week chilling out, sip smoothies and watch television while facebooking for an entire week. no, and i didn't invite him to do his own laundry while hibernating, either. nah, that would be mean!

i didn't freeze my bootie off after two days in the 80s (ahh, sweet irony of life) in the "worship in the field" with our students at church on wednesday nite. i didn't struggle to lift my arms in worship because my blanket would fall off, and i didn't for just a small moment, wonder how that activity would have been more comfortable with a Snuggie.

and i didn't envision the commercial that i could make with that, either. i didn't grab a hershey bar and eat it while i rooted for a graham cracker and struggle to get two marshmallows out of the bag for s'mores. i didn't shrug my snuggie-less shoulders and munch away on a cold, unassembled s'more because i was just too lazy to wait for a stick to roast my marshmallow. and i didn't go back for more chocolate. no, that would be un-leaderlike!

i didn't tear up while i drove home after dropping my daughter unit (d-unit) off for her spring break trip with her friends.

i didn't lament the fact that i've spring breaked with teenagers for the last four years (and by that i mean the hubster and i have taken lots of teens with us to destin and have chaperoned their antics) and was/am having serious withdrawls. i also wasn't second-guessing the decision to not go along with the other moms.

i wasn't picturing myself on the deck of the cruiseship, all cocoa-buttered up, sipping something cool from a glass, or oogling the ice sculpures on the all you can eat buffet. i am not kicking myself for not being there to capture every moment as i hone my photography skills. no, i'm super happy to be here in rainy, cold tennessee and who wants to be all rested and tan anyway!?

no, i would never admit to wandering my house after boy wonder left to go back to school and d-unit was away, trying to get used to what an empty nest would feel like for real in five (gulp) months. i didn't talk to my dogs more than usual, didn't walk by her room and sigh, and i most certainly did NOT text my son about two hours into the experience and tell him, "oh, my aching empty nest"to which he replied, "oh, my bulging pockets. cha-ching making big bucks at work!"

i didn't snap my phone shut in disgust while failing to stifle a chuckle. and i didn't answer the husband's puzzled look with a "don't look at me! i wasn't texting!"

nope, not me!